thankful

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This isn’t unusual for me, but because I do it every year, I want to do it this year as well. I have quite a lot of gratitude regularly, but I like to take this time to share a list of things that I’m thankful for right now, in honor of America’s Thursday holiday, Thanksgiving.

I hate to be prosaic but the top of my list is always being thankful for the people in my life: my family, the people who put up with my eccentricity; my best friends in the entire world, who pick up the phone in the middle of the night when I’m drunk and being obnoxious and I know full well they’re doing the same thing; the animals in my life that make me smile, like Shanti, Elle, Cinder, Dude, Khya, Kona, Xena, and Hercules.

I am thankful for last summer and this semester. I’ve been told that transitioning gets harder as you get older. High school to college seemed easy: I got homesick as everyone does, but I never felt incapacitated with uncertainty and fear of being forgotten or left behind. By the end of my undergrad I was feeling confused, and lacking clarity on who I really was and what it is I wanted and stood for. I felt like the fun. song “Some Nights” almost every day. The lyrics plead:

What do I stand for? Oh what do I stand for?
Most nights, I don’t know anymore…

…Well some nights, I wish that this all would end
‘Cause I could use some friends for a change
And some nights, I’m scared you’ll forget me again
Some nights, I always win

I’m thankful for this because last summer, which was so full of traveling and love and coffee, as well as this semester, which has been full of new connections, papers, and standing on my own two feet, has allowed me to figure that stuff out.

I’m less afraid of a lot of things, including being forgotten and not accomplishing everything. I have a better sense of who I am and what it is I stand for than I’ve ever had before. I’m thankful for clarity.

an extremely brief overview of summer12

I’m thankful for the weekend before last when I got to go up to the ATL and see Danceworks. I was incredibly overcome by joy and pride and love when I saw how much my friends and peers had grown artistically, technically, and emotionally in their dancing.

Steph, Nicole, Chandler, Bertha, Christiane, holy crap, you guys.

This reminded me of why I’m going to be a professor of dance one day — seeing these young women grow and mature as movers and artists is incredibly satisfying, and left me swelling with pride. I love you all so much.

photo cred. izzie

I’m thankful for my sisterbears, and especially helping one of my sisterbears plan her wedding! I’d never ever leave either of my sisterbears alone with the craziness of our parents trying to plan weddings, but I’m so excited to be a part of this joyous occasion. I miss both my sisters and I can’t wait to see them again, and have our whole family together in one place.

I’m thankful for dog parks, and late nights; I’m thankful for bethel, and dancing, and living the life. I’m thankful having both the opportunity and the means to go to school and study everything. I’m thankful that I have an able-body that allows me to dance, and exercise, and enjoy the tastes, smells, textures, sounds, sights of everything around me. I’m thankful for missed connections. I’m thankful that an agreement and cease-fire are being put into effect in Gaza.

I hope you all are able to take a few moments to remember what you’re thankful for, and have the opportunity to spend time this week with those you love, cherish, admire, and hold dear to you.

love, B

PS. THIS MEANS CHRISTMAS MUSIC TIME, EMIRY!!!!

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