I don’t know what that title means, but what I’m getting at is my love of being occupied. This semester is totally kicking me in the pants, but in the best way possible. I am dancing, I’m reading about dance, I’m writing about dance, I’m sleeping, eating, breathing, metabolising dance. You know why?
BECAUSE IT’S MY TRUE LOVE
Glad we got that straightened out. What I mean is that I have between 12 and 14 hour days 6 days a week, and I spend almost no time in my apartment (awake), and I’m the tiredest of tired lions and yet I don’t feel worn out. I don’t feel exhausted. I don’t feel bad.
I feel amazing.
I remember once in modern in undergrad we had to go around and say all the reasons we danced, and when everyone had gone around I turned to whoever was sitting next to me and said “Huh, I guess we’re all junkies…of adrenaline.” and I think it’s true.
Dancers/performers/artists, we thrive off of this sense of accomplishing something, and I really do think that because the reward is so great (that sense of accomplishment) it doesn’t feel like work.
Maybe that’s how I know that I’m doing what I love.
First, I want to apologize for how long it’s taken me to write something new. I went on vacation and then school went from zero to ninety in less than twelve seconds. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love it, I’ve just been extremely occupied with class, rehearsals, and work!
Apologies aside, I’ve been thinking a lot about forgiveness and what it really means to forgive someone. I have to decide if I’m ready to do that. I’ve been wondering a lot about the nature of forgiveness and what it takes in the forgiver to actually do it. Why do we hold on? What are the benefits of holding on (because all I see are the disadvantages)?
“Forgiveness requires a sense that bad behaviour is a sign of suffering rather than malice.” — Alain de Botton
In addition to a sense that poor behaviour is a means of expressing suffering, I think it also takes a realization that forgiveness have more to do with the forgiver than the forgive, or the recipient of the forgiveness.
Bad behaviour isn’t a sign of malice. Bad behaviour isn’t a sign of malice. Is there anyone you’ve been waiting to forgive? What do you think it’ll take?